Ride of the Valkyrie
by Rostand
Summary: Here's Rostand, weighing in with her own ship and her own crew. Meet the crew of the U.S.S. Freyja, Akira-class heavy cruiser, ship of the wall. They have adventures. Shoot things. Make friends. Get sick. Get stranded. But most of all, they entertain. You
1. Episode 1: Take Her Out

Ride of the Valkyrie Ride of the Valkyrie **Episode 1: Take Her Out**

**Authrix' Note:** Here we go. 

Morning never dawned in the brightly-lit, grey corridors of Starbase 234, but if it had, it would be crisp and cool, with a hint of dew in the air, and only beginning to usher away the night when Captain Siobhan Brodie strode towards docking port three, a duffel bag in her hand. She had tried to tell herself that her eagerness to arrive early was only so that she could get her things in order to properly greet her crew. But a part of her knew that was a lie. The final tweaks on her new command, the USS _Freyja_, had only been completed yesterday; today was the first chance she would have to look over the ship. She was a junior-grade captain, with only one ship command under her belt; still, her actions upon taking the field rank of captain when her own had died in the line of fire had been enough to warrant her a brand-spanking new heavy cruiser. _Freyja_ was of the heavily-armed Akira-class ships of the wall. 

A smile appeared on her face as she stepped into a turbolift, mind on the new ship. The USS _Nautilus_, her last post, had gone into spacedock for extensive refitting, and Brodie had been offered the captaincy of the _Freyja_. She was glad she had accepted it. The _Nautilus_ had been an old Miranda-class ship, barely capable of warp 7 and ridiculously low on weapons. Whereas the _Freyja_, as all Akira-class ships, could maintain a cruising velocity of warp 9.8 and was one of the most heavily-armed ships in Starfleet, a relatively new design. 

As Brodie stepped into the docking corridor and bore down on the personnel access to docking port three, movement along the corridor coming the opposite direction caught her eye. While it wasn't unusual for the inhabitants of a Starbase to maintain an around-the-clock schedule, it was still early in the base's "morning" for most people to be out. The other figure stopped at the docking port and stilled, apparently waiting for her. Brodie's mind raced as she ran through possibililties. _Medical or science staff_, she thought, looking at the uniform. _Bag looks like a medical kit, and the other a Starfleet issue duffel. Vulcan woman, slightly Asiatic look, petite . . . my new doctor? What was her name, Jahet, Jenek . . ._

"Good morning, Captain," the Vulcan said. Her voice was soft, with the assurance of total logic that all Vulcans had in their voices. 

"Good morning," a beat, "Jahek, is it?" 

"Aye, Captain." 

_Oh thank the spirits . . ._ "You're out and about early." She keyed in the access code and the door slid open. 

"I wished to get sick bay in order before the crew arrive," she said as they stepped in. "I understand it is Starfleet protocol to subject arriving crew to a brief physical before releasing them for duty." 

"Yes, it is, I was going to check if you wished to uphold that." 

"Captain?" 

"Many ship's doctors often forgo the physical and settle for a quick review of a crewmate's medical history," Brodie said, as they stepped into the turbolift together. She had been in this part of the ship, but the last time the yarddogs had let her aboard, sick bay was still a mass of electrical wiring. A red flag in her memory caught her mental eye. "I'm surprised you didn't know that. From your words, I would think you haven't served on a Federation starship before. But you served on the . . . _Okinawa_?" 

"_Orinoco_." 

"My apologies." 

"I was transferred to the USS _Orinoco_ after their chief medical officer resigned, so the crew was already established when I arrived." 

"I see." 

They continued in companionable silence to sick bay. Jahek stepped inside, glanced around, and with a terse nod proclaimed it, if not exemplary, then adequate. But Brodie had served with enough Vulcans to recognize a happy one when she saw one.

"I'll leave you to it then," she said, as the Vulcan carefully and precisely laid down her bags. "You will be going ahead with the physical?" 

"Yes, Captain,' Jahek looked around. "According the crew manifests, you will be expected 437 to report for duty?" 

"Somewhere around there," Brodie said, hiding a smile. 

Jahek nodded. "I am expecting two nurses. That should be adequate. I will go ahead with the physical." 

"Very good. I will make sure that all new personnel report to you. Have them also check in with me if they haven't already. Give me a shout if you need anything." 

"Yes, Captain." The Vulcan turned around, effectively closing the conversation as she bent over the medkit. Brodie smirked at the neat French braid of black hair that fell to just below her shoulders. _Long hair, hmm. I always thought Vulcans regarded it as a sign of vanity . . ._

As she left sick bay, Brodie pulled back the sleeve of her uniform and glanced at the chronometer on her wrist. It read 0723. Brodie snapped the sleeve back down and thought. The crew would begin arriving at 1000, and the ship was scheduled to leave the Starbase at 1600, which was designed to sufficiently stagger the arrival so as not to overwhelm the welcoming committee. Brodie had decided to use her security personnel to act as guides, as many of the incoming crew were fresh cadets, and the ship's design was fairly new even for seasoned officers. Her chief security officer had served under her on the _Nautilus_, and had brought part of her security team with her. Those few would arrive at 0930 to familiarize themselves with the ship. 

_So_, she thought, following the curve of the passage, _that gives me just about two hours on an almost empty ship._ Her mouth curved. Excellent. 

A quick detour rid her of her duffel and she dumped it unceremoniously just inside the door to her quarters. As she stepped out of the turbolift, lights flickered on and the bridge suddenly glowed to life. She almost jumped at the somewhat creepy effect. "Good morning, Captain Brodie," the ubiquitous calmly modulated computer voice said. 

"Good morning," she replied, out of habit rather than cognition. The bioneural circuitry that the _Freyja_ was equipped with made the ship more self-aware than previous models; intellectually, she had known that, but it hadn't quite sunk in. 

"Do you wish to begin normal operating readiness?" the computer queried. 

"No, thank you," she replied. "Begin initializing main systems at 0900 and run a level one diagnostic on your systems as soon as operations are at normal. Understood?" 

"Yes, Captain. See you then." The displays, which had lit at her entrance, now went dark again, and she was left in the normal illumination of the bridge. She looked around. The configuration was different—she would have to get used to Ops being on that side, rather than in front of her. She sat in the helm control chair and leaned over the controls. She had seen schematics, of course, but she still wanted to familiarize herself. She prowled around to all the consoles, seeing when key systems were and where everyone would be in relation to her. Finally, she stood before the captain's chair. Grey, moulded, armless. She took a deep breath, and sat. 

It felt good. The chair was soft, but not too soft. There was a console on her right side. When she touched it, it immediately lit up. The small screen would allow her to call up tactical information or any files she wanted. It was also possible to reroute helm control into that pad. She lifted her hand away and it went dark. She stood with a sigh and strode into her ready room. The door slid open and the lights came on, but no cybernetic voice greeted her. For that, she was somewhat glad. A computer screen sat on the curved desk before the huge window. A neat pile of PADDs sat next to it. She dropped the bag again and went over to the desk, leaning against it as she shuffled through them. Two were crew manifests, one was an inventory of weapons systems and modifications, another the same for the bioneural circuitry and ship systems. The fifth and last was their itinerary and current mission. She sat down and quickly copied one of the crew lists to the tactical PADD to give to M'Rdat when she arrived. 

"Computer," she said, raising her voice slightly. "What is the location of Jahek?" 

"Jahek is in sick bay," the computer replied. 

"Computer, list the current occupants of the ship." 

"Brodie, Captain Siobhan. Jahek, Doctor." 

Brodie waited a beat to see if the computer continued, but it remained silent. She stood and collected the PADDs. The door chimed softly as she left. She stopped at sick bay and found the doctor busy checked supplies off against her own PADD. She left a crew manifest with the Vulcan and continued her rambles. When Brodie was groundside, she was fond of long walks. So that's what she did now. For an hour and half, she strolled through almost every inch of her ship, from the shuttlebay to engineering to the mess hall, and she was waiting when the docking port opened to admit part of her security team. 

"M'Rdat, it's good to see you again," she said warmly as her chief tac officer stepped onto the ship. 

"Captain Brodie," she said by way of greeting. M'Rdat was one of those rare half-Klingon, half-human crossbreeds, and Brodie wasn't sure which half she liked better. The conflict made her sometimes violent and irrational, but generally her human side managed to use the Klingon side to her own advantage. She was tall, but not bulky. Her skin was light, but her Klingon eye-ridges were pronounced. Her hair looked like a bad die job, but Brodie knew this wasn't the truth. It started off a dark blonde near her skull, and darkened to a deep brown near the ends, which were almost to the small of her back and kept in a ponytail most times. 

They clasped hands with warm familiarity before Brodie handed her the tactical PADD. "Looks like you've got some new toys to play with," she said. One dark eyebrow lifted as the halfbreed scanned the PADD quickly. 

"Powerful," was her only comment. 

"Lieutenant, I want you and your people to greet people as they come aboard." Brodie said, addressing the group as a whole. "Point them in the right direction, make sure they belong to me. Everyone has to check in both at sick bay and with me. I'll be back and forth between here and the bridge. Understood?" 

"Aye, Captain." The security officer turned to the three other mustard-uniformed men behind her, still shaking sleep from their eyes. "Find your quarters. Get some coffee. Know your way around. I want you back here no later than one minute to 1000." She paused, and glared. "Move!" 

They moved. 

At 1034, Lieutenant (senior grade) Helene Rostand officially logged into her new post as Chief Ops/Communication Officer for the USS _Freyja_. The steely eyed Klingon/human woman who met her at the docking port had offered a gruff 'Welcome' after finding her name on the crew manifest and marking her as having arrived. She did offer a guide to quarters or sick bay, but Helene had declined, preferring to find her own way. Her commission had also provided her with her berth number, so she headed in that direction first, trying not to drool at the newness of the ship. She was heading towards one of the turbolifts, humming some 18th century Earth symphony to herself as she strolled along unhurriedly, when she suddenly heard a twin thump behind her of someone springing into the air and was yanked off balance backwards by two stick-like arms that clamped themselves around her neck. 

She dropped her duffel and twisted out of the hug/deathgrip with an ease born of long practice and faced her attacker with a grin. The two woman smirked at each other. "You haven't changed a bit, Tali," Helene said. 

"I have certainly too!" She replied indignantly. "I've gained six whole pounds!" 

Helene stood back and looked up and down the ninety-pound-when-wet-down frame and lifted an eyebrow. "I don't believe it." 

"I'm hurt!" Tali sniffed theatrically, and reclaimed her duffel from where it had been discarded in the attack. Helene did the same, and they resumed the walk towards the turbolift. 

"I swear, Small-And-Skinny-One," Helene said, "I still don't know how you passed the Starfleet physical exam. I'm sure they should have booted your scrawny ass out." 

"Love you, too, old friend," Tali replied wryly as they stepped into the lift. 

The two were a study in contrast. Lieutenant (junior grade) Tali deLaki, science officer, was short and skinny — not slender, but skinny — with a mass of curly hair that never quite seemed under control. Her companion was tall and broad — not fat, but built big, with wide hips and shoulders. She had a surprising grace to her movements that most people ignored. Her hair, while equally curly and of the same colour, was under control, pulled back in a bun from her round face. 

"I see you've finally got that lieutenancy you deserve," Helene replied, pronouncing the rank as the archaic 'left-tenant'. 

Tali's hand went to the pips on the collar of her blue uniform. "Yeah, finally. And I see you've gone up as well," gesturing at the other's pips, "Senior-grade lieutenant," stressing the 'loo' sound. 

Helene smiled. "Give it up, you'll never convert me." 

"I knew it! I knew you pronounce it _just_ to piss me off!" 

"Would I ever do that to you?" 

"_Yes_." 

Silence. 

"So where's your cabin?" 

"D-deck, 234" Helene replied, looking at the directional indicator. 

"Ooh, close to mine." Tali pulled a slightly rumpled piece of paper out of her non-existent cleavage and checked it. "Yeah, just down the hall." 

"How convenient," Helene remarked as the lift slowed and stopped. "Where's the menagerie? I'm surprised you don't have animals draped all over you and stuffed in the bag." 

"They're back on the base, I'm going to go pick them up when I have a moment." 

Helene paused a beat. "You're serious? You're actually bringing the menagerie on board?" 

Tali shrugged. "I've got the captain's permission." 

Helene rolled her eyes. "Oh dear lord, who did you sleep with to get that?" 

"None of your business," Tali said, mock-indignantly. Then she grinned and winked. "But wouldn't you like to know?" 

Helene opened her mouth to reply as an older man in a mustard uniform stepped out into the corridor in front of them. They nodded politely as they passed, and before Helene could reply, they arrived at Tali's quarters. She rechecked her commission, and keyed in the correct code. The door slid open and the pair got their first look at their new quarters. 

"Impressive," Tali said, dropping her bag and looking around. "These Akira-class are sweet." 

"Niice," Helene agreed, stepping in and looking around. "With a little reshuffling, you might actually be able to fit most of the menagerie in here." 

"I can stack," Tali replied absently, as she got to her knees to investigate under the desk. She immerged on the other side and slid into the chair. "Mmm, cushy." She bounced a few times and investigated the contents of the desk. It held the standard view screen/computer console and three PADDs. Two were empty and the other was a schematic of the ship and the necessary information for her to find her way around the science department of the computer. Her bright grin disappeared as she concentrated, frowning, on the information. Helene turned away. 

"I'll go dump my stuff, and then head down to sick bay. I'll meet you on the bridge." The door slid open, and Tali leapt after her, banging her knee on the underside of the table as she went and still holding the PADD. 

"Wait! I'll go with you," she said, limping to a place beside her friend as they went down the hall. Helene's room was four doors down on the opposite side, and identical on the inside. She too had a PADD containing a run down of ship's systems and layout, which she grabbed after a cursory look around and they headed to sick bay. 

The door slid open just as they reached it, and two crewmen came out. They stood back, nodded politely in greeting, and continued inside. There weren't many people inside — then again, it was still early. Two more crew members were sitting on the beds while medical personnel — a Bajoran man and a human woman — looked them over. The third, a Vulcan woman, looked up at their arrival. 

"Over here, please," she said, looking them up and down and gesturing to a third bed. The pair looked at each other, and Helene made a little "go ahead" motion with one hand. Tali handed her the PADD and hopped up, legs swinging slightly. Helene leaned against a bulkhead and read over her own information while the Vulcan gave the lieutenant a once-over with the tricorder. 

"Name?" 

"Tali deLaki." 

The woman punched something into her PADD. "Ah yes. Lieutenant, science officer. Pentarus V. No long-term affects from the mining colony listed. How have you been feeling lately?" 

"Ship-shape and Bristol fashion, Doc," Tali replied. 

The Vulcan quirked an eyebrow. "My name is Jahek." She resumed her scan. "I will be the chief medical officer for this ship." 

"Nice to meetcha, Doctor J," Tali replied, mouth quirking in a grin. 

"I am aware of the human tendency to assign 'nicknames' to those they are close with." Jahek said, "However, I am not 'close to you' and would prefer if you would address me by either 'Doctor' or my given name." 

"Can do, Doctor," Tali replied, stressing the title. 

Jahek snapped the tricorder closed. "You appear perfectly healthy. You are, I hope you realize, severely underweight, but this seems from your file to be normal. You will, however, soon have a sizable bruise on your right knee shortly." 

"Thanks," Tali said shortly, hopping down again. Helene took her place with more poise. "Helene Rostand," she said in her lilting voice. 

Jahek looked her up. "Hmm, numerous past fractures, most in the ankles and wrists. How are those feeling?" 

"They crack occasionally," Helene replied, rotating one wrist to demonstrate. Jahek frowned at the series of soft pops and cracks from the joint. 

"Those will be weakened, and more likely to injure. I also see you have a family history of high blood pressure. Any effects from that?" 

"None." 

"Migraines, yes?" 

"Yes, but only infrequently." 

Jahek scanned her quickly. "Very good, you're both clear. Check in with the Captain if you haven't already." 

"Thank you, Jahek. See you 'round," Helene called back over her shoulder as they left the sick bay. 

"Well she's . . . Vulcan-y," Tali commented a few moments later. 

"Hey, nothing wrong with being Vulcan-y. They're _all_ like that." Helene said as they stepped into the lift. 

"True, true." The display flashed as they moved up the ship. Finally it stopped and they stepped onto the bridge for the first time. It was almost empty, none of the panels illuminated. The only figure was a tall woman with dark reddish hair that was tied back firmly in a long braid in a red uniform, who looked up at their entrance. She flowed to her feet and they both braced to attention as the dim light gleamed off the four gold pips at her throat. 

"Captain Brodie?" Tali said, more of a statement than a question. 

"Yes, that's me," the captain said, "You are?" 

"Lieutenant Tali deLaki, ma'am." 

"Lieutenant Helene Rostand, ma'am." 

A moment of mental searching her memory . . . "Ah, my command crew!" She stepped forward and shook their hands. "I've heard only good things about you from your captains." 

"Who's been lying to you, Captain?" Tali said, half a smirk on her face. 

The Captain smiled. "I'm sure it's no lie." She gestured around her. "This is the bridge, welcome to it. We're scheduled to leave spacedock at 1600 hours, and I'm holding a meeting of my senior staff at 1500 hours. Until then, do what you like. When the chef arrives, you can grab a meal, but the replicators in your quarters should be working. Feel free to look around." She could tell her officers had been waiting for that order, from they immediately started forward. Tali went to the far side of the bride, where her console lurked. Helene started down towards the helm, paused, looked around, and made a beeline for the Ops station. Consoles came alive under able hands, and the Captain watched with barely-veiled humour as their eyes glowed in the light of the consoles, and the familiar tones of keys being struck hit her ears. 

Her new science officer was busy exploring her sensors, when another mental red flag waved at Brodie. "Lieutenant deLaki," she said, striding over to the console, "you were the one whose request I granted to bring aboard some science specimens?" 

"Oh, yes, Captain," Tali fumbled in her uniform for a moment and produced another PADD. "Here's a list of the specimens." 

Helene almost laughed. Specimens? Beloved pets was more like it. 

Brodie looked over the list. "Will there be enough room in the science lab for all these?" She asked after a moment. 

"There is, technically, enough room, but not if any research wanted to be carried out," Tali replied. "I keep only a few specimens in the lab at the time. The rest I usually house in my quarters." 

"Your quarters?" 

"Yes, Captain," she coughed delicately. "My quarters have often been referred to as 'the jungle' or 'the menagerie' by my crewmates." 

"You don't mind it?" 

"Not at all!" Tali said emphatically. 

Brodie raised an eyebrow. "Very well. As long as they don't bother your neighbours, that's fine. If I get any complaints at all, your 'menagerie' will be moved to cargo storage or the lab. Will you need any help bringing them aboard?" 

"No, Captain. I have four hours, and _Loo_tenant Rostand has agreed to help me." 

"_Left_tenant deLaki and I have served together, and she used that to bludgeon me into helping with the heavy lifting," Helene replied from the other side of the bridge. 

Brodie nodded and tapped her combadge. "Brodie to M'Rdat." 

M'Rdat here, Captain. 

"I've got my science officer bringing aboard some specimens shortly. Give her any assistance necessary." 

Aye, Captain, M'Rdat out. 

They were interrupted by the turbolift sliding open again. The woman who stepped out this time was in a red uniform, tall and chesty, with light brown hair clipped up tightly. She looked around and stepped towards the Captain. "Captain Brodie? Commander Karyn Burnham." 

"Ah, Number One." Brodie stepped forward and shook her hand. "I've been following your career with interest for some time now." 

"I was surprised to get a request for First Officer, especially so soon after my promotion and from a captain I didn't know," Burnham replied. 

"I'm good friends with your captain from the _Shenandoah_," Brodie replied easily. "This is only my second command. We can learn together." 

"I'd like that, Captain." 

"If you'd step into my ready room, we can discuss our current assignment . . ." 

As the officers moved across the bridge, Helene caught Tali's eye and jerked her head towards the turbolift. Tali nodded and left her station with not a little reluctance, but followed her friend as they moved back to the docking port. 

Almost an hour later, a man in a mustard uniform and carrying a duffel skirted around a flatbed gravcarrier in the base corridor filled with tanks and cages, and stepped through the open portal. The gruff security officer looked up at his entrance, and he stopped in front of her. 

"Name?" 

"Konrad Davies." 

A pause. "Chief Engineer. Welcome aboard. You must report to sick bay and to the captain before we leave spacedock." 

"Thanks, Lieutenant." Konrad picked up his bag again and moved on down the corridor. He, like many others, found his quarters, dropped his gear, and went in search of sick bay. It was busier now, as more people began arriving, so he had to wait for a few minutes until a Bajoran medical officer gave him the once-over with a tricorder and asked him some questions about his medical history. Then he made his way to the bridge. People were bustling around the corridors, and his heart started to hum at the feeling. He had been groundside for too long. He stepped onto the bridge, moving to the side to let a crewman passed him into the lift. A woman in a red uniform was looking over a PADD and frowning in front of the captain's chair, so he took a chance. 

"Captain Brodie?" 

The woman looked up and turned towards him, and Konrad immediately knew he was wrong as three, not four, pips glowed back at him. "I'm Commander Burnham," she said, without scorn or ridicule. "Captain Brodie's first officer. Did you need to check in?" 

"Aye, I'm Konrad Davies, engineering." He extended a hand and she took it firmly. 

"Good to meet you. The Captain wanted to speak with you as soon as you check in." She tapped her combadge. "Burnham to Brodie." 

Go ahead, Number One. 

"Chief Engineer Davies has arrived, ma'am." 

Very good. Have him meet me in Engineering right away. 

She looked at him and he nodded. "He's on his way, Captain. Burnham out." 

Konrad nodded sharply and turned on his heel, stalking off the bridge as quickly as he could. Engineering was half the ship away and ten decks down, but he still managed to make it there in less than five minutes. He paused a moment outside the door to catch his breath and smooth down his uniform before striding in unhurriedly. 

"Impressive, Mr. Davies," said the woman in red leaning on the warp core railing. "It would have taken me twice as long to get here." She turned around and stepped forward to meet him. "I'm Siobhan Brodie." 

"Captain Brodie, nice to meet you. Commander Burnham said you'd wanted to talk to me . . .?" he replied, attempting to mask his nervousness with a competent façade. 

"Yes." She gestured at the dim warp core. "We leave spacedock at 1600. I want you to get the warp core running, start giving us back our own power so there'll be no hiccup when we break the umbilicals. Once we have main power up, I want you to run a level two diagnostic just in case. There should be sufficient engineering personnel on board to get you started. You have duty rosters, yes?" 

"Aye, Captain, I made them up last night," he replied. "Did you want to see them before I post them?" 

She waved a hand. "No, that's fine, I trust your judgement. You've seen the doctor?" 

"One of her aides." 

"Good, good. You'll be alright here?" 

"Yes, we should be fine. I'll have us up and running by 1600." 

"1500." 

"Captain?" 

She blinked and shook her head, mentally retracing the conversation. "Oh, sorry. I'm holding a meeting of my senior staff at 1500, and I expect you to attend. I want the diagnostic begun before that." 

"Understood, Captain." Brodie nodded sharply and left, moving with the inherent grace of a Starfleet captain. Konrad watched her go, shook himself, and tapped his combadge, opening a general channel. "All Engineering personnel on board, go directly to Engineering. I repeat, all Engineering personnel to Engineering." He looked at the warp core. "Looks like this is it, baby," he said, and got to work. 

At 1302, Crewman Caitlyn Mooney was hurrying towards the docking port of her first Starfleet post, the USS _Freyja_. Her new red uniform, so subtly different from her cadet uniform was comfortable yet odd, like a worn pair of jeans suddenly a size too big. She tried not to be intimidated by the Klingon officer who greeted her, or the dispassionate Vulcan doctor. She tried not to get lost in reporting to the bridge, and also tried to keep her voice from squeaking when she shook hands with the First Officer — Commander Burnham, that was her name — and tried not to panic when she got lost finding her quarters. She did find them, eventually, and was suppressing her feelings of panic warring with nervousness in her gut as she hurried towards where she thought the mess hall was. She thought she had almost got them under control when she rounded a corner smack-dab into an armful of cages. 

"Whoa!" an unfamiliar voice yelped as the pile scattered over the floor and various shrieks and growls of bestial protest issued forth. Caitlyn sat down hard as a cage carrying a six-winged bird hit the deck beside her. She shook her head, slightly dazed, and the repressed tears of frustration came welling up again. 

"You okay there?" the voice said again, and its owner reached down a hand to help her up. She looked up into the jovial face of a large woman in a mustard uniform, whose brow was creased with worry. 

"I—I'm fine, ma'am, really," Caitlyn said, scrambling to her feet. "Sorry." 

"My fault, too," the woman replied, bending down to straighten the cages, and Caitlyn's eyes widened as she saw the pips on her collar. She almost squeaked. I ran down a lieutenant! she thought, panicked. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god . . . Hastily she bent down and began helping her. 

"D—did you need a hand carrying these?" she asked hesitantly. 

"If you haven't anywhere to be, sure," the woman replied easily, lifting most of them. Caitlyn took the remaining three, two birdcages and a tank whose reptilian occupant hissed at her as she lifted them. 

"I was just going to the mess hall to get some lunch," Caitlyn replied, following her to a lift. "If I could find it." 

"I'll show you myself as soon as we unload these," the lieutenant offered. "I'm due for a break and Tali can haul her own damn menagerie through hell and creation," she muttered. "Tali deLaki, science officer," she clarified for the confused crewman. "She hauls this damn menagerie from post to post, supposedly as 'specimens'." They stepped off the lift on a crew hallway, and the woman set down a few cages to open a door. It slid open, and Caitlyn's eyes widened at the profusion of cages and tanks that filled almost half the room. They set down their burden and the unfamiliar woman arched her back, cracking it, while the crewman took a curious look around at the flora and fauna. 

"Lieutenant Helene Rostand," she introduced herself, extending a hand after a moment. 

"Crewman Caitlyn Mooney, ma'am," she replied, taking the hand and shaking firmly. 

"Sorry if I'm being rude, but are you . . .?" Helene made a jerky motion towards her forehead. Caitlyn's hand flew up almost unconsciously to touch the ridges over her eyes. 

"Half." She stammered. "Cardassian, that is. M—my father . . ." She fell silent. 

Helene clapped her on the shoulder. "It's okay. Now come on, my young friend," the lieutenant said, stepping out into the hallway. "Let's get some grub and leave Tali to break her own back." 

They walked in silence for a while, the lieutenant content not to speak and the crewman too timid to start a conversation. Eventually the former solved this dilemma. 

"This your first post, Mooney?" 

"Yes, ma'am, it is." 

"Fresh from the Academy then. Those were the days . . . I've seen too much of space now." She mused. 

"You've served on many other ships then, ma'am?" 

"Yup, quite a few. The _Erstwhile_, the _Merrimack_, the _Bradbury_." She gave the younger woman a mock glare. "And stop with the 'ma'am', you're making me feel old. Call me Helene if you want, or Rostand if you prefer." 

"Yes, m—Lieutenant Rostand." 

"There's hope for you yet." Helene said, turning into the main mess hall. "And here we are." 

As they ate, Helene talked to Caitlyn about her experiences on other ships. "Now, I'm going to tell you some things I wish someone had told me on my first day," she said, pointing her knife at the crewman, who nodded eagerly. "First, the Captain and her senior staff are not the be-all and end-all of knowledge and wisdom. God knows they're as fallible as the next person, so don't let that cloud your judgement." She took another bite and a long swallow of her drink. "Second, get your sleep when you can. Times like these, we could be at red alert any time, so you better be rested for it. Third, ask questions. Most senior officers aren't bears, and they were once in your position. Fourth, do what the Captain orders, but if you see a better way, tell her. She will be reasonable." Another bite, another swallow. "And fifth, take everything with a bit of humour. It's a long ride, and if you don't know how to laugh at yourself it'll be a lonely one." She finished off her meal with a flourish, and leaned back. "Any questions?" 

_A thousand and one!_ Caitlyn thought, but she started with, "Well, actually, I was wondering . . ." 

Some time later, Helene glanced at the time display over the door and broke off, mid-sentence, to swear. At Caitlyn's look, she said, "I've got a meeting with the captain in five minutes, I've got to go. See ya around!" Caitlyn twisted in her chair to see Helene disappear into the hallway. 

_A meeting with the captain? But I heard . . ._ gears whirred and clicked for a second, and: _She's senior staff! Ack!_

Helene berated herself for bailing on the young crewman so abruptly, but she definitely didn't want to be late for this meeting. As it was, she met Tali in the lift, the science officer brushing a smear of dirt from the pant leg of her uniform. They grinned at each other as they stepped out into the corridor, and hurried to the briefing room. They stepped inside with precisely one minute to spare and hurried to take their seats. At exactly 1500 Brodie stood and strode to the front of the room. 

"Ladies and gentlemen, I've assembled you, my senior staff, to brief you on our first assignment and to make sure everyone gets to know each other." She paused. "The _Freyja_ is a new ship, which gives me the difficult position of starting a crew from scratch. You have been chosen for your abilities, your reputations and yes, your availability. Some of you already know each other, and some are complete strangers." She nodded at Karyn Burnham. "Number One will make the introductions." Brodie sat, and Burnham stood. 

"I am Commander Karyn Burnham," she said, standing and moving away from her chair. "I will be acting as the Captain's First Officer for as long as she'll have me." She moved to the side. "To my right is Lieutenant Helene Rostand, our Ops and Communications officer." Helene nodded 'hello' to the others sitting in the room. "Beside her is—" 

The introductions were interrupted by a tall, broad man sporting a structured coif and moustache and reeking of cheap cologne who strode in, not at all apologetic, and seated himself with a flourish. 

"Mr. Vanderbilt," the Captain drawled from her chair, "Was it the custom on your previous ship to not show up on time to meetings?" 

"My apologies, Captain," he made it sound like a dirty word, "I was . . . busy," the last said with a leer in the general direction of the room. 

"Continue, Number One," Brodie said, raising an eyebrow. "I'll speak with you later." 

Burnham blinked. "Yes. Next to Lieutenant Rostand is Lieutenant-Commander Konrad Davies, our Chief Engineer. Next is Lieutenant M'Rdat, Chief of Security and Tactical. Doctor Jahek is our senior medical officer. Beside her is our chief science officer, Lieutenant Tali deLaki. And our late arrival is—" 

"Lieutenant-Commander Miles Vanderbilt," he said with aplomb, adding another leer at anything vaguely female in the room. Helene rolled her eyes at Tali, who pantomimed gagging at his overwhelming cologne. 

Brodie glared at him as she stood again. "We leave spacedock in just under one hour. Our orders are to proceed to the Hironi system to oversee the evacuation of a colony under threat of invasion by the Romulans. The colonists have already been alerted and are preparing to leave. It will take us four days at warp 6 to arrive." She grinned, a feral smile. "I want to push that a bit. The _Freyja_ is designed for a maximum cruising speed of warp 9.8. If we can maintain warp 9.5, we'll make it in two days. Mr. Davies, can the engines handle it?" 

He frowned, thinking. "She is designed for 9.8, and all systems are functioning normally. I'd say we can do it, but build up to the 9.5 slowly to test her out." 

"Very good, Mr. Davies. Ms. deLaki, the colony botanists were working on some new medical breakthroughs using local plants. They have requested to transport some of their specimens on board the _Freyja_, as the evacuation ship doesn't have the right equipment. Can we do it?" 

"I'd need to know the environmental conditions necessary for the plants to survive," she replied easily. "Preferably ahead of time to reconfigure the lab's environmental controls. Depending on how many specimens they have, I'd say we can take the greater majority of them." 

"Excellent. I'll put you in contact with the colony botanists after we leave spacedock." She turned to face M'Rdat. "M'Rdat, what is the status of the weaponry?" 

"All weapons systems are operating at maximum potential capacity, Captain," the halfbreed said immediately. "I've taken the time to familiarize myself with them, as the _Freyja_ is more heavily armed than any I've previously served on." 

"Make sure you know them like your own child, M'Rdat," the Captain said. "Starfleet Command says the probability of armed combat is low, but I'm inclined to think otherwise. Ms. Rostand, what is the status of the ship's systems?" 

"All operating at their best, Captain," she replied. "In better condition than any ship I've flown." 

"She'd better be," Brodie said wryly. "We're almost ready to fly. The time for leaving spacedock is still set at 1600 hours, the only way that would change is if the yard dogs held us back. However, I haven't heard a peep from them all day, so I want you all at your posts at 1530." She glanced at the chronometer. "Which happens to be in 12 minutes." She straightened, and looked around once more. "Let's fly this baby." 

"Umbilical support cut off, all systems functioning normally," Helene announced. "Station is retracting all access ports and begin to rotate away from us." 

"Mr. Vanderbilt, break away from the station." Brodie ordered calmly. 

"Aye, Captain," he replied smoothly, and the _Freyja_ slipped her moorings just as smoothly. 

"Set a course for the Hironi system." 

A moment's pause. "Course laid in, Captain." 

Brodie smiled exultantly. "Engage." ** Here endeth ye Fir_f_t Parte. Tvne ine nexte time for ye Old _f_econde Parte. **


	2. Episode 3'5: Twentieth Century Genocide

Ride of the Valkyrie Ride of the Valkyrie **Episode 3.5: Twenty-Fourth Century Genocide**

**Authrix' Note:** This is a very, very bad pun. Sorry. 

Tali wandered into her quarters after a rather long stint in the lab, going over some of the plant samples that she had picked up on Gilligan's Island, as the crew had started calling the planet where their diplomatic away team had been inadvertently stranded during their own three-hour tour. She was tired, but wanted to have a cup of tea and feed her lovelies before crashing for the night. She had already made her apologies for missing supper with Helene. 

"Green tea, hot, two sugar," she asked the replicator, and took a deep breath of the aroma as it appeared. She took a sip as she bent to release Hammurabi from her cage, draping the boa over her neck. _I'll just get out the Judeza crickets . . ._ she thought to herself, considering the food she had available. Judeza crickets were long-living, required virtually no food, and could live in an enclosed environment with little difficulty, which made them an ideal food source for her finicky reptiles, whereas her other mammals and birds could do with replicated food. Some of the more aggressive mammals enjoyed the crickets, too, but she avoided feeding them a steady diet, as Ju crickets were hard to get and they had to last. 

Tali slid the container out from its storage place, and flipped open the lid. And stared. 

It was completely empty. 

She swore, and examined the box more closely. It was old, and somewhat flimsy, and a rather large hole had been clawed out of the side, the route of escape for the Ju crickets. _What the hell could have done . . ._ Her eyes widened. _That rat!_

Tali set the mug down on her desk and quickly found the cage she was looking for. As she moved, she saw three crickets hop into one of her plants, and she swore again. She looked at the cage. From a short distance, it looked closed, but the hooks had been snapped, and the lid was just lying flat, instead of locked closed. Tali dropped to her knees and began looking about frantically. Hammurabi slid off her shoulders in pursuit of the tasty treats now hopping freely about the quarters. 

"Hitler?" Tali called softly. "Hitler, you rat, where are you? Hitler?" 

Helene jerked in surprise as Tali's panicked voice came over the comm. deLaki to Rostand! 

"Tali, what is it?" 

Helene! I need your help in my quarters, now! 

"Why? What's wrong?" Helene asked, a thousand possibilities running through her mind. 

Tali's voice was on the edge of panic. Hitler's going to kill all the Ju's! **FIN **


	3. Episode 4: The Game of Acquisition

Ride of the Valkyrie Ride of the Valkyrie **Episode 4: The Game of Acquisition**

**Authrix' Note:** Written for Konrad's birthday. He gets to be the hero for once. 

"Captain, I'm picking up a distress beacon," Helene announced one uneventful alpha shift. Brodie immediately straightened and turned to her Ops officer.

"Source?"

Helene frowned. "It's weak . . . there. I've got it. An escape pod, about six thousand kilometres away, bearing two-three-seven-mark-four. It looks like it's been hit by phaser fire. One life sign." She glanced up at the captain. "It's a Ferengi."

Brodie's brow creased as she briefly wondered what a Ferengi escape pod would be doing out here, but she pushed it out of her mind as she ordered the course change. "New heading, bearing two-three-seven-mark-four. Drop to impulse. Once we're in range, beam the survivor directly to sick bay and tractor the escape pod into shuttlebay three."

"Aye, Captain."

"Oh, for the love . . ." Konrad muttered as the lights again flickered and the readings he was watching fluctuated wildly.

"I'm sorry, sir, but I thought that . . ." the nervous young ensign beside him stuttered, and Konrad waved a hand dismissively.

"Don't worry about it, that conduit's been giving us hell for weeks now." He glared in the general direction of the warp core. "She's just throwing a snit fit, that's all," he said, more to the ship than to the ensign.

"Sorry, sir?

He blinked. "Sign of stress. Talking to inanimate objects. Not good." He sighed. "You hold down the fort. I'll take a look at it myself."

"Uh, yes sir!" the ensign piped up after him as the chief engineer grabbed a toolkit and headed out of engineering.

"We're in range of the escape pod, Captain," Caitlyn said.

"Main viewer," Brodie ordered. A badly damaged little escape pod appeared, phaser fire marring the sides. "Lt. Rostand?"

"The biosigns are very weak, Captain," she replied. "I don't know what kind of shape that one's in."

"Bridge to sickbay," Brodie opened a com channel without hesitating.

Sickbay here, the calm voice of Jahek came through.

"Prepare for an emergency medical transport. One Ferengi, badly wounded."

Aye, Captain. Ready here. 

Brodie nodded at Helene. A moment later the Ops officer nodded in confirmation. "Transport complete. Locking on to pod with tractor beam . . . we have it."

Brodie nodded. "Excellent. M'Rdat, I want a security team to look it over. Get an engineering crew down there if needed. Helene, scan for ships, debris, anywhere our visitor could have come from. Caitlyn, resume course, warp 4." She stood and strode towards the door. "Number One, you have the bridge. I'm going to visit our Ferengi."

Jahek quickly ran a tricorder over the Ferengi. His gaudy green clothes were smudged and rumpled, but there were no visible signs of wounds. He was barely conscious, tossing his head and muttering incoherently. His fists were clenching and unclenching convulsively. The doctor frowned. The readings she was getting . . . they conflicted with each other, almost like he had been half-poisoned and half-suffocated.

A faint smell attracted her attention. She sniffed, but the source was not readily identified. "Do you smell that?" she asked her nurse, a young Bajoran woman.

She sniffed the air. "No, ma'am, I don't." She glanced down at the Ferengi, distaste curling her upper lip. "It's probably him."

Jahek lifted one of those expressive Vulcan eyebrows of hers. "Indeed." She shook off the faint feeling of unease, and returned to her examination, trying to reconcile the readings to any prognosis she could give.

Konrad continued muttering to himself as he wriggled his way into the Jeffries tube. His _Freyja_ was a beautiful ship, almost straight out of the yard, but she had developed a personality-and quickly. This particular power conduit wasn't so important, per se, in that if it pooped out, the ship could still function almost normally, but important enough that when it blew, it was damned annoying, all 'round. Sometimes he was convinced the ship developed problem spots just to keep him on his toes.

He pried open the control hatch, and as he did, there was a brief power surge that shut down all the lights in the tube. He sighed and, after only minimal amounts of spinal contortions, managed to reach his flashlight, when, as soon as he angled it up to shine on the panel, the lights came back on. "Freyja . . ." he growled. "I love you like a sister, but you're a bit of a bitch to me . . ." He dropped the flashlight, and began tinkering with the controls, hoping it wouldn't short out on him and make Blackened Engineer the next meal on the sickbay menu.

Jahek didn't look up when the sickbay doors whooshed open to admit the captain, who strode immediately over to the biobed where her patient lay.

"Is he conscious?" Brodie demanded.

"Yes," Jahek replied shortly. "Beyond that, I can't tell you much."

Brodie bit her lip briefly before bending to look the Ferengi in the eye. "You're aboard the Federation starship _Frejya_. I'm Captain Brodie. Can you tell me who you are? What happened to your ship?"

The Ferengi didn't reply, simply rolled his head sideways and smiled at the captain. A very large, feral smile, full of pointy teeth and so many bad, bad implications. Brodie felt her spine stiffening and she almost leapt away from the bed. But as she did, her head began to swim and her vision blurred. She blinked once, twice, thrice, trying to bring the Ferengi into focus, but failed. She frowned, wavering as she tried to make her mind focus on anything, but a low chuckle was the only coherent thing left to her, and that chuckle followed her down into dark oblivion . . .

Tali sighed blissfully as she sunk into the one chair in her quarters not covered with cages or animals, as Hammurabi unwound herself from a potted tree and draped herself around the pixie-like scientist's neck, kneading the tense shoulders. "Mmm, my lovely, you're too good to me . . ." Tali murmured drowsily. Some problem with ship's systems had sent one of her experiments into a decline, so she had spent all of her free time over the last three days nursing the poor little shrubs back to health. Now that they were, again, at normal levels, she was having the first true "me-time" for a long stretch.

She opened one eye lazily, gazing in the general direction of the replicator. She could really have used a cup of tea, but lacked the willpower to actually get up and make it. She tried a half-hearted attempt at telekinesis, but gave up and simply sank further into the chair. Tea could wait . . .

"Gah!" Konrad gave a strangled yelp as the conduit he had been patiently fixing decided to vomit on him. Literally. Konrad swiped at the goop on his uniform disgustedly. It was going to take a long while to get used to this bio-neural circuitry . . . He sighed. He had managed to fix the power flow through the conduit, at least temporarily. A connection had been fried, and the ad-hoc job he put together made good use of some copper wiring and the handyman's best friend, what was called on old Earth "duct tape". But even with the conduit fixed, he would have to get a new gel pack, or there was a sizable gap in their information network - not too sizable, considering it slowed computation speed by a fraction of a nanosecond, but on a starship, that could be too slow.

He began the slow backwards crawl to get to the main Jeffries tube he had come in. He knew where there was a storage locker for the gel packs, only a couple decks up . . . it would be faster to get there by tube than take the turbolift. His feet thumped onto level ground and he stood up, taking a second to roll his shoulders and work a kink out of his back. He covered a yawn and began climbing.

Kitty leaned on the back of the helmsman's chair, staring at the starry vista, as if sheer optical scans could reveal the location of that Ferengi's ship. She turned swiftly when Helene's voice rang out. "Commander!"

Kitty turned, expecting to see the lieutenant punching in a command to display whatever it was that she had found. But instead, she saw the lieutenant's knees buckling and her leaning heavily on the console. Kitty glanced around. The security crewman near the door had already collapsed, and M'Rdat was getting close. She opened her mouth to shout something -anything - but she couldn't. Her head began to throb, and she began to sway on her feet. Before she lost consciousness, she managed to gasp out, "Computer . . . lock . . . command codes . . . authorization . . . Burnham . . . omega . . . baker . . ." Then she, too, joined her captain in that all-encompassing blackness.

Tali was carefully filling the water bowl of one of her more aggressive little pets - a particularity devious rat named Hitler - when she heard the door chime. She opened her mouth to answer when she heard muffled voices and someone forcing the door. Instead, she dropped silently to her stomach and army-crawled backwards under a broad-leafed creeper. She could see up to knee level through a variety of cages and furniture. The door slid open irregularly, as whoever it was pushed their way in. She couldn't see their faces, but their clothes (what she could see of them) and their voices screamed at her, "Ferengi!"

"This is a waste of time!" one of the Ferengi snarled, then panted. "No human would live in this room . . . it's far too hot . . ."

"Shut up," the other said. "We were told to check all the rooms to make sure no one was left awake."

A flash of movement in front of the prone lieutenant told her that Hitler had realized his cage was still open and had taken advantage of the situation. She gritted her teeth. _I'll get him later . . ._

"I know, I know," the first replied. "So hurry it up."

She saw the legs move forward into the room. "These little patrols don't have to be completely unprofitable . . ." she heard one say after a moment, and then heard the unmistakable sound of something being tossed and caught in one hand, and she clenched her fists. _Paws off my stuff, you money-grubbing little vermin . . ._ she thought with an apology to all little vermin for the unfavourable comparison.

They both laughed, and moved further into the room. She tried to inch back further, but realized that it they came even a foot closer, there was a very good chance they'd see her . . . then, almost lazily, Hammurabi slithered onto centre stage, curling before the two Ferengi and raising almost two feet of her thick body into the air. Tali was gratified when they both jumped backwards.

"There's no one here," the first one said hurriedly.

"Of course not," the other one replied. "We've checked thoroughly."

"Yeah-huh."

They both fled.

Konrad swung out of the Jeffries tube, gel pack replaced and ready to go. He straightened, then paused as something hit him. He had come out on one of the upper levels of Engineering which, if not exactly deserted, was certainly less populated than the main level. Still, he should have heard voices carrying from below - and all he could hear was the low throb of the warp engines. Puzzled, he moved to the railing and looked down. Now he could see his engineers - unmoving, sprawled where they had been working. He couldn't tell if they were dead or unconscious, but he didn't see any blood - a definite good sign. Well, as good as could be expected when the entire engineering crew was lying on the ground and not showing any signs of life.

Konrad was about to move towards the lift, when he heard the main engineering doors open. He quickly crouched and scuttled sideways so he could see into the space below but anyone looking up wouldn't be able to see him.

Three figures appeared, and his eyes widened as he realized what they were. Ferengi. Then his eyes narrowed as he ran through possibilities - why they were here, why the crew had been knocked out - and came to the conclusion that it was unlikely they would be responding to any distress call made by the captain. Therefore, they had done something to render the crew unconscious - and hopefully still alive.

One thing Engineering had was good acoustics. Konrad had no problem hearing every word they said.

"This place reeks of human," one of them sneered. "That bitch of a first officer locked the command codes, so we can't get this boat moving. Pile these humans somewhere and see if you can get the warp drive online."

"But we don't-" one of them began, and the first - obviously a leader of some kind - cut him off scornfully.

"I don't care. Just do it. And keep an eye out. We can't be sure the gas got everyone." He growled, and glared at the other two. "Get to work. I'll be on the bridge." He turned on his heel and strode out of the room.

The Ferengi who had protested turned to the other and snapped, "Well, you heard him! Get to it! Check those upper floors for any Starfleet still left."

Konrad silently scrambled backward into the tube he had come out of. He pulled the hatch shut behind him and, using a laser tool, welded the lock shut from the inside. He knew from experience that this particular hatch looked like a circuit panel, so the Ferengi wouldn't try too hard to open it. Even so, he retreated back down the Jeffries tube to a safe distance. He leant back against a bulkhead and tapped his combadge. "Davies to bridge," he waited a moment, and got no reply. "Davies to sickbay." Still no reply. He decided to try individual people. "Davies to Brodie. Davies to Rostand. Davies to M'Rdat. Davies to deLaki."

Konrad! 

Konrad's heart almost stopped as Tali's voice came over the com. "Tali! Are you all right?"

I'm fine. Where are you?" 

"In a Jeffries tube on deck 16," he replied. "What about you?"

I'm in my quarters, she answered. Do you have any idea what's going on? 

He sighed. "It seems that the Ferengi have taken over the ship.

I know. Two of them came into my quarters, looking for anyone 'still awake'. My pets scared them off. 

He nodded. "I overheard three of them talking in Engineering. It seems they used some sort of gas to knock everyone out. The Jeffries tubes are on a separate circulation ventilation, that's why I wasn't affected." He frowned. "Your quarters are on the same system as the rest of the ship. You should have been knocked out along with everyone else."

Guess I'm just lucky, she replied. Are there any other parts of the ship that are on a different ventilation system? 

Konrad thought for a moment. "The Jeffries tubes, your lab, and the holodecks. I think that's everywhere."

So whoever was in those areas would still be conscious? 

"Well, if there wasn't an open door and the Ferengi haven't found them, then yes." He glanced up as he heard a hatch thump open somewhere behind him. "They're starting to check the Jeffries tubes. I'll have to keep moving. They can't get at the computers, and we're dead in the water."

Command codes? 

"Yup." He glanced up again. "Look, try and find out who was in the holodecks and the labs. I know none of my people were in the Jeffries tubes when the Ferengi attacked. Use the computer in your quarters. They probably won't be back there for a while. I'll try and meet you there."

What are you going to do? 

He started back down the tube. "There was only two of them in Engineering. I'm going to see if I can rig the warp core to eject or sufficiently screw the systems up. There's also a weapons locker, see if I can grab some phasers."

All right, but com me again in ten minutes, even if nothing's gone wrong. 

"Will do. Davies out."

Will do. Davies out. 

Tali sighed. The Ferengi had captured the ship . . . the captain, Kitty, Helene, probably all unconscious . . .

She moved over to her desk and sat down at the terminal. "Computer, list crew members currently in holodeck one, two, or three."

Riley, Logan. Follett, William. Moore, Roberta. Helon, Kea. Rybok. Gernet, Jacques. 

Tali mentally noted their names and continued her query. "Computer, list crew members currently in science labs.

No crew members currently in any of the science labs. 

"Computer, what is Lieutenant-Commander Davies' present location?"

Deck 17, maintenance accessway 259. 

Tali sighed in relief. He hadn't been dragged into the open yet. "Computer, what is Captain Brodie's present location?"

Captain Brodie is in sickbay. 

Tali bit her lip. "Computer, how many Ferengi are currently on board?"

There are twenty-seven Ferengi on board the _Frejya_. 

That many? Tali realized they may have more than a bit of difficulty in reclaiming the ship. "Computer, show me an interior schematic of the _Frejya_." She pored over it. The armoury was three decks below her, but it was close to holodeck one. Holodecks two and three were two and one deck away from her, respectively. She scrunched up her nose, thinking. Then she shook her head and tapped her combadge. "deLaki to Riley . . ."

Brodie woke slowly. Her head was throbbing and her mouth felt like she'd had a mouthful of something particularly foul before falling asleep. She didn't open her eyes as she fought waves of dizziness. When she did open her eyes, she shut them again out of sheer disgust. A Ferengi was not the sight of choice for those waking up from what was quickly becoming the hangover from hell. Except she couldn't remember the fun that generally came before the hangover. A hand shook her shoulder roughly and she opened her eyes again, squinting against the sudden brightness of the lights. She recognized where she was - sickbay, on one of the biobeds. With an incredibly foul little Ferengi scowling down at her.

"Give us the command codes," he demanded.

"What?" she croaked.

"The command codes!" he bellowed. "Give them to me!"

"I don't respond well to threats," she replied, struggling upright, her voice a dry rasp. "I will give you nothing until you tell me who you are and what you've done to my crew and my ship!"

The Ferengi smiled that horrible, sly smile that all Ferengi seemed born with. "How I do despise a woman who doesn't know you her place. Your crew is safe, merely unconscious, and your ship-" he grinned again "-isn't your ship anymore." He leaned in closer to her, making her lean back slightly. "It's mine." He turned away, and gestured expansively at the sickbay. "And such a fine ship it is, too. Almost brand-new, Akira-class, heavily armed, the latest in Starfleet technology - yes, this will fetch a fine price on the Romulan black market." He suddenly whirled and thrust his face in close to the captain's. "That is, if you give me the command codes."

Brodie tried to smile, but her face wouldn't cooperate. "Money. Of course it's for money. What isn't, with the Ferengi?" Now she was the one to lean in. "I will never give you the command codes. I will die before I see this ship fall into the hands of the Romulans. Or the Cardassians. Or yours, Ferengi."

His face contorted in anger. "We'll see how you'll be singing in a short while. I had planned to hire your crew to the dilithium mines on Daneb IV as labour, but there are so many aboard, I may just have to . . . liquidate some of my holdings."

"Bastard!" Brodie lunged at him, but two other Ferengi grabbed her arms and wrestled her back down onto the bed.

"Sweet dreams, Captain," the boss-man said mockingly, as a hypospray was pressed to her neck and she knew no more.

Konrad poked his head out of a small maintenance hatch and glanced around cautiously. No Ferengi in sight. He wormed his way out of the hatch and dropped (almost) noiselessly to the ground. He stole over to the main reactor control and quickly dropped behind it to get at the wiring. He removed a panel and began switching wires. He rerouted two wires, detached three more, and attached one that hadn't been attached before. That wouldn't have deterred even the most inept of engineers - but he also removed several key matrices from the control panel, without which the warp drive could never be brought online. Oh, they could get the warp core online, but no power from it would ever reach the nacelles. He quickly replaced the panel and slipped the matrices into a pocket of his uniform. He had another idea . . .

Konrad popped his head over the console and gave the area another sweep. No Ferengi in sight . . . he climbed carefully out from the warp core chamber and moved over to one of the engineering consoles. He quickly keyed in a few commands, and hooked up an abandoned tricorder to the computer system. It would only take a minute to make the necessary connection . . .

He heard footsteps. Heavy footsteps, above him. Konrad pressed against the wall and looked up. He could see one of the Ferengi on the level above them. The Ferengi hadn't seen him. Konrad glanced at the tricorder. Almost done . . . He sidled over to the nondescript weapons locker that the Ferengi hadn't opened yet - it looked just like any other storage locker. He quickly flipped the lid open, and grabbed a phaser and a phase rifle. The phaser he tucked into his uniform, but he kept a grip on the rifle as he sidled back towards the tricorder. A quiet beep informed him that it was done. He glanced up at the Ferengi, who was now moving towards the lift. He grabbed the tricorder and backed away slowly-

and ran straight into the other Ferengi.

"Hey!"

Konrad swung the rifle around and shot at point-blank range. The phase rifle, set on the lowest setting when in storage, was still enough to knock the Ferengi back at that close range, sending him flying into the opposite wall. That single cry had alerted the other, who ducked sideways when Konrad fired, managing to avoid the blast. Konrad swore and backed off. He couldn't get a clear shot, and by the time he did, the invader would have raised the alarm.

The chief engineer simply turned, and ran.

Tali was still poring over the information she had requested from the computer when Konrad's voice over the com startled her.

deLaki! 

"Konrad? What's wrong?"

I was discovered. I stunned one, couldn't get the other. What's the word? 

"Two crewmen were in holodeck two, but the door was open. There were also three in holodeck one, three security officers doing a training exercise. They're on their way to the armoury to try and hold it down. The last was in holodeck three, one of my science staff. He's on his way to the science lab, like I told him."

Get to the armoury. I'll meet you there. 

"Yes, sir. Be careful. You, too."

Davies, out. 

Tali sighed. She took a moment to transfer what she had been working on to a PADD, slipped it into her uniform, and headed for the door. She paused, though, backpedaled a few steps, and lifted Hammurabi from her treetop perch, draping the huge snake around her neck like a scarf. Then she quietly stole into the corridor and began to make her way through the ship.

Brodie had her second rude awakening.

"Your people fired on one of my men!" the boss-man screeched as she regained consciousness.

"Your men took over my ship!" she retorted.

He scowled at her. "Order your people to stand down or I will order my men to shoot first, ask questions later. And unlike Starfleet, we don't bother with the stun setting." He smiled that sly little smile. "Unless, of course, you would give me the command codes . . ."

She snorted derisively. "Do you think I'd give in that easily? Try a bit better next time, Ferengi."

He glared at her for a moment, then turned and snapped at two of his men. "Bind her. Bring her to the bridge."

Konrad met three more Ferengi, but he was moving so fast that they were the ones caught by surprise, and it was no big challenge to stun them. He made his way up to the armoury using the Jeffries tubes - with the command codes locked, the turbolift didn't work. He met Tali on the same deck, and she crouched by a turn in the corridor. He cleared his throat quietly to announce his presence, so while she whirled, she didn't attack him. She simply nodded and motioned him closer. When he approached her, he saw what she was crouching over - a four-and-a-half foot long, thick-bodied snake that undulated around the corner and out of sight.

While he wasn't a herpiphobe, he had to admit the sight gave him the heebies.

She waited a minute, then moved into the corridor, scooping up the snake as she went. "Ferengi can't stand 'em," she explained. "Haven't met a single one."

"Lucky." Konrad replied, gripping the phase rifle and keeping an eye out to both sides. They quickly reached the corridor where the armoury was, and when Tali poked her head around, she saw there were two armed Ferengi standing guard. She tapped her combadge. "deLaki to Follett."

Yes, Lieutenant. 

"Where are you?"

Inside the armoury. Two Ferengi are outside. They tried to get in and failed. 

"We're on our way, deLaki out." She risked another look. "Okay, I'll set Hammurabi to distract them, then you jump in, guns a-blazin', sound good?"

Konrad smirked. "I like the 'guns a-blazin'' bit."

"So do I," she murmured, setting the snake down and shooing her around the corner. "Come on, sweetums, do your thing . . ."

"You're a very strange woman," Konrad said as he moved into position.

"Why thank you," Tali replied, listening. She grinned as she heard Ferengi shouts of "Go! Shoo! Get away!" She smirked. "Hit it!" she ordered.

Konrad swung around and laid down a full spread of phaser fire. Both Ferengi dropped almost immediately. Konrad allowed himself a smug smirk as they hurried to the armoury door and banged on it. "It's Lt. deLaki!" Tali called when there was no reply. There was a brief pause, and the sound of bolts and other mechanisms being turned and drawn, and the armoury door swung open. Konrad slipped inside, but Tali hesitated.

"Tali?"

"Hammurabi . . ." she said, looking up and down the corridor.

"The snake'll be fine, now get in here."

"Hey, that snake just saved our lives," she grumbled, but she allowed herself to be drawn in and the door to be closed. One of the security officers took up a position by the door, and the other four found seats on crates and storage lockers.

"So what's the plan?" Follett asked.

"Plan, shman, let's mount up," Riley retorted.

"Men and their 'guns a-blazin''," Tali sighed.

"I believe it was you who came up with that term," Konrad responded.

"It was situation-appropriate," she sniffed. "I actually do have a plan," she said seriously as she pulled out the PADD. "I was thinking . . ."

As Brodie was hustled onto the bridge, she took a surreptitious look around. Her senior staff were crumpled at their stations, and no one was moving. Her guards shoved her roughly down into the centre of the bridge, where the boss-man was lounging in her chair.

"Now, my dear Captain," he drawled. "I will have those command codes."

"I will never give you the command codes," she sighed. "You're incredibly dull for a Ferengi."

"Oh, no, my dear Captain. You will find I am not no dull." That horrible smile was back. "You see, I have almost your entire senior staff right here, and the rest are locked in your armoury. They'll never get out alive, and nor will you."

"This is useless!" she raged. "I won't give you the command codes, and killing me will do you no good! Why do you continue to delude yourself?"

"We shall see . . ." That smile. "We shall see."

"How long would it take to synthesize the pathogen?" Konrad asked.

"Once I'm in my lab, it won't take more than ten minutes to make enough of it to douse the whole ship." Tali replied. "My work's almost done for me. All I had to do was analyze samples of what was left in the air and rebuild parts of the code."

"We'll have to make sure we get the whole ship," Follett put in. "We can't let them have pockets saved by the Jeffries tubes, like we were."

"The holodeck doors are all open?" Konrad asked.

Tali nodded. "Yup."

Konrad grinned. "Good. If I can get to Engineering, I can set every Jeffries tube hatch to open, except for one section. We'll have to seal off a section for ourselves so we can retake the ship once the gas has been flushed." He gestured around the armoury. "We can get into the maintenance system here, and we'll have to make it to our posts by tube or corridor. Follett, you go with Tali. Riley, Moore, you go make some noise somewhere far away from Engineering and the labs. Got it?" Nods all around. "Okay, good. Let's go."

When Riley and Moore had headed off to wreak havoc with the Ferengi, Konrad handed Tali the tricorder as she was about to wriggle through. "With this tricorder, you can trigger either an ejection of the warp core or build up pressure in the plasma coils, triggering a core overload. If either one of them becomes necessary, do it."

Tali nodded. "I understand." Then she turned and was gone.

Fifteen minutes later, Brodie struggled weakly as the Ferengi big man gestured at the screen. "There we are, Captain. This is where your course is taking us," he drawled.

It was a star. A very large, very young, very hot star. It would vapourize them as soon as they entered the corona. When Kitty had locked down the command codes, she had locked down helm. They were drifting. And falling closer and closer towards that glowing ball of death.

"Sir!" one of the Ferengi said urgently.

"What is it?"

"One of the men has found one of the Starfleet crew that was resisting."

"Really?" How Brodie was coming to hate that smile. "How interesting. Bring him to me."

"Yes sir." The Ferengi frowned. "Uh, sir, he says that it's a woman."

The boss-man scoffed. "Women. Feh. Probably trying to plead for her life. Bring her anyway. I wish to see her."

Brodie started in surprise when, soon after, Tali was frog-marched onto the bridge. She had assumed that the slight officer would have easily been knocked out by the gas.

"Well, woman, what do you want?" The Ferengi boss-man said, facing her.

Tali twitched her arm out of the Ferengi goon's grip, and placed her hand on her hip. "I want to form an alliance."

Brodie blinked and stared at her, searching for some clue that she was joking, but found none. The Ferengi boss-man recovered quickly and replied, "Oh do you? And why would that be?"

"Rule of Acquisition 761," she replied with aplomb.

The Ferengi's generous brow lifted. "Really? What kind of alliance?"

"A financial arrangement." She stepped forward. "I get the codes, I get a cut."

"Ah, but recall Rule of Acquisition 942," he countered.

"Does that apply to all females, or just Ferengis?"

"How big of a cut?"

"Fifty percent."

"Fifty? You begar me. I have a family to feed," he said smoothly. "Ten."

"Rule of Acquisition 1713, my friend," Tali replied. "Forty-five."

"I find I must follow the wisdom of Rule of Acquisition 34. Fifteen."

"Forty."

"Surely you must feel some moral qualms about betraying your captain," the Ferengi said expansively. "You won't accept more than twenty."

"Thirty-five, but no lower." Tali grinned like - well, like a Ferengi. "Rule 1815"

The Ferengi laughed, a horrible sound. "Thirty-five it is. You are the reason Rule 2846 was written."

Tali inclined her head graciously. "Kind words. Now I'll get you your command codes." She strode over to the Captain. "Captain, I do hope you'll excuse me," she said with aplomb, and placed her fingertips on Brodie's brow.

"What the hell are you doing?" Brodie hissed. "You're no empath."

"He doesn't know that," Tali replied. Over her shoulder, she called. "If we're going to be in business together, my friend, you would do well to remember Rule 2167"

"That I will," he murmured appreciatively.

Tali closed her eyes and pretended to concentrate. "Tucked into my belt is a large capsule. Can you see it?" she murmured.

Brodie cast her eyes downward, flicking them back up again quickly. "Yes."

"Try and fight me off. Press it as hard as you can for as long as you can. Got it?"

Instead of replying, Brodie suddenly violently pushed against the lieutenant, who staggered backward. Brodie rushed forward and pinned her to a console with her body weight. "I trusted you!" she yelled. "I gave you chances, I believed in you! How could you betray me like this? How?" She made a further show of trying to attack the other woman, but the job was done. The capsule was empty. Tali nodded, and Brodie stepped back. Already she was beginning to feel woozy. The Ferengi would feel it, too. Tali slapped her combadge.

"deLaki . . . to Davies . . . mission . . . complete."

Understood. 

"You really are a true Ferengi . . ." the boss-man slurred. "We could have gone far together."

Tali grinned. "Rule 78, my friend. 788"

And then she collapsed.

Konrad waited until the ad-hoc computer system he had rigged to work inside a Jeffries tube told him the gas had been cycled out of the computer system. Then he, Follett, and Garnet began sweeping the ship for the Ferengi. They tied them up, sent them back to their ship, and threatened to fire if the Ferengis didn't beat feet far away from the _Frejya_. With the help of the Emergency Medical Hologram ("please state the nature of the medical emergency"), they had roused the captain and put the _Frejya_ on a safe course out of harm's way, while they woke the rest of the crew. M'Rdat was pouty (well, as pouty as a Klingon could be) at having missed all the fun, and Helene had just cracked up when Brodie had related Tali's bargaining technique.

Brodie had also given Konrad and Tali, and the other four who had avoided the gas, an official leave of duty for two days to recover. Which is why she was surprised the next day to see Konrad climbing out of maintenance hatch.

"I thought I told you to get some rest," she said, giving him a hand up.

"I know, I know," he said defensively. "But Freyja was whispering to me . . . do this, fix that, find that ruddy snake . . ."

"Snake?"

Konrad blinked. "Oh. I didn't tell you about Hammurabi?"

"Hammurabi?"

"Tali's slithering little friend. She drove off the Ferengi."

"And where is she now?"

Konrad shrugged. "No clue. She slithered off somewhere after we got into the armoury."

Brodie suppressed a shudder. "I echo my ship's sentiments. Find that snake. Before it finds me."

Konrad grinned. "Yes, ma'am." He paused. "Wait, there's something off behind this panel . . ." He crouched down, and put an ear to the wall. After a moment he straightened. "Yes, Freyja, I'll get to it. I have to find Hammurabi first," he muttered to the ship, then flushed when he realized that Brodie was gazing at him with one lifted eyebrow.

"You do realize that talking to inanimate objects is a sign of insanity?"

"Uh, yes, Captain. I do."

"Just so we're all clear. Now, about finding this snake . . ."

FIN

**Notes:**  
Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:   
1 "Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies."  
2 "Females and finances don't mix."  
3 "Blood is thicker than water, and latinum is thicker than both."  
4 "Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to."  
5 "Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit."  
6 "Deep down, everyone's a Ferengi."  
7 "Never gamble with an empath."  
8 "When the going gets tough, the tough changes the Rules."

The reason Tali didn't get knocked out is that the gas disappated in the higher heat of her room. Couldn't figure out a way to work this in. 


End file.
